As the campaign enters its final days, I wanted to take some time to thank all of you for your support. I'm glad that you were able to find my Internet web site, despite the typographical error in the address thing. URL? Is that what it's called? Anyway.
These are challenging times for our country -- and I will not deny that it has been a challenging campaign. We have faced declining poll numbers (the media would have you believe that my opponent is now leading by 72 points) and a certain amount of financial difficulty (as an aside, one of my first acts in Congress will be to enact legislation to make it possible to sell your plasma as often as four times a week). Also, it turns out that apparently I'm not actually on the ballot in many precincts. I think I must have missed a few filing deadlines. And several members of my family are no longer speaking to me, which is really more of a personal issue, so I'm not sure why I brought it up here.
There was also that one week I got so depressed, I couldn't even get off the campaign bus. Well, okay, it was a city bus. The campaign bus had been repossessed by that point.
My point is, I remain hopeful for the future. People ask me what my plans are should the election not go our way on Tuesday. The truth is, I haven't even considered that possibility. We must remain optimistic. We cannot allow negative thoughts to pollute our thinking. As the Bible says, "Fear is the mind-killer." So, honestly, I have given no thought to what I will do if I should lose on Election Day.
I will, however, say one thing for sure: I'm not going back to erotic dancing.
So, again, my friends, thank you for your support -- and don't forget to vote as often as you can on November 4!
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Have you thought about skywriting? I mean as a campaign tool. Seemed to work for Ron Paul. Do you think you could encapsulate your entire platform in vaportrail message? My sister's ex has a crop duster and I hear DDT makes some wicked-bad clouds....
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